Broads
There’s nothing worse than seeing incredible talent go wasted on some schlocky material. Joe Symon and Jennie Fahn might have seen one too many Golden Girls episodes to crank out this recycled hash of banal one-liners, tired numbers and a predictable storyline concerning age and friendship. Senior citizens, the obvious target audience, might find this as irresistible as the Early Bird Special at NoHo Diner, but don’t let that fool you, I caught most of them snoozing in their seats.
Okay, so there were some laughs, but these were the generous titters anticipating the cymbal crash and the marvelous execution by seasoned pros. Each of them has the chops and the credits to pull out surprisingly delightful performances with so little to work with, if anything, they give this show some camp value, for those who think sequins and palm fronds are a hoot.
Recognizable among them are Leslie Easterbrook from The Police Academy franchise given the unenviable task of the group’s foil and fading, Botox beauty. Broadway’s Barbara Niles shines even behind her frumpy but fiercely loyal maternal role. Miss Puerto Rico, Ivonne Coll struts her stuff as the feminine version of Ricky Ricardo while stage and screen veteran June Gable mouths off as an insecure widow with a heart of gold. None of the roles are particularly original or witty, but these gals almost convince us as they swivel around, showing off their foxy mama gams.
Between the numbers and constant wardrobe changes, the ladies take turns cracking jokes that are the equivalent of knock-knock set-ups. “When my husband and I go to bed, he turns me off and kisses the TV good night.” Ba-da-bum. The musical numbers leave even more to be desired. “Lift It Up” cautions against aging at any cost, the jingle “Soup to Nuts” celebrates the virtues of frugal dining, and “The Social Security Rag” is self-explanatory with some well-placed digs directed at the government. The ballads fair better with the sweet, but sentimental duet “Just Yesterday We Were Girls” and Niles’ feeling solo in “Something Unexpected.”
Kay Cole’s choreography offers little variety and rarely steps outside the simplistic chorus line formations. There are the occasional eye-catching props, twirling around with pink canes, red umbrellas, and faux foodie plates, but the sparkling costumes by Shon LeBlanc take center stage. Ritzy, glitzy and bright, the costumes almost steal the show with their blinding beaded appliqués. The most notable and somewhat curious ensemble sports colorful saddlebags filled with plastic flowers on each hip. One wonders if this wasn’t meant to be a drag show done straight. I’m pretty sure Bob Mackey called and he wants his sequins back.
Voiceovers by Kaye Ballard and Shecky Greene interject a couple of amusing bits, garnering bigger laughs than the action onstage. Unfortunately, these don’t come often enough.
Treat your mother-in-law to a pair of tickets. She’ll probably appreciate the gesture, and if she’s over sixty-five, might even enjoy this show.
“Broads! The Musical”
Runs through April 4
Thurs, Fri and Sat at 8pm
Sundays at 3pm
El Portal Forum Theatre
5269 Lankershim Blvd.
North Hollywood, 91601
PH: 818-508-4200
www.broadsthemusical.com